Thank you Google

 13 February 2022

We were homeward bound in our car after a family outing in the jungles.  Because of poor network connectivity I and my wife had both switched on google maps on our respective phones so that we have a back-up in case any one phone packs up.

We reached a fork on the deserted forest road.  

"Turn Right" said the voice on google maps on my phone.

"Turn Left" said the voice on google maps on my wife's phone.

I stopped the car at the fork and contemplated.

"Both routes will take us home - so why over-think?" said my practical wife.

"But why did Google suggest 2 different routes even though we are in the same car?" asked my analytical daughter, voicing my thoughts.

"May be Google is hinting that it is time our parents split" said my son with his usual poker face.

"I think Google recommends routes based on the risk profile of the individual" I said.  "Google realises I am a risk-taker so it is recommending an adventurous route to me.  And it is recommending a very safe-route to your mom given her risk averse profile" I said with some smug satisfaction in my voice.

"Whatever route you take remember that you are the one driving" said my wife.

My daughter now brought in a new dimension : "Actually as Google is my client I know that Google is carrying out an experiment to figure out who is the main decision maker in each household.  So if we take a left, Google will realise that mommy is the decision maker.  And if we take a right Google will realise Dad is the decision maker" she said.

"Let us take the right" I said.

"No, let us take the left" said my wife in a steely voice.

"I curse Google for running experiments that lead to domestic dis-harmony and ego issues" said my son.

"Re-routing. Take Left" said Google on my phone.

"It is time you changed your phone" said my wife in a conciliatory tone.

"Thank you Google" said my daughter as I took the left.

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